Once upon a time, the Persian King of Borsaro and Queen Jasmine were standing on the top floor of their palace, gazing into the distance. The king turned to his queen and said, "Jasmine, I have a question for you. Will you answer me truthfully?"

"Of course," replied Jasmine.

"Jasmine, do you love anyone in this world more than yourself? Do you love others more than yourself? Or do you love yourself most?" asked the king.

"I must admit that I love myself more than anyone else in this world," answered Jasmine. "I am most important to myself."

The king smiled and said, "Jasmine, I feel exactly the same way. Only those who truly love themselves can truly love others."

Afterwards they went to see Buddha together. When they arrived at Buddha's residence, they bowed before him and sat down beside him. The king then told Buddha about their conversation earlier.

Buddha listened carefully and responded by saying that he had thought long and hard about this issue but could not find anyone who loved others more than themselves because everyone loves themselves first and foremost. Therefore one should always empathize with others' feelings as if they were one's own when doing anything that might hurt them since everyone is most important to themselves.

By loving oneself first it becomes possible to experience other people's affection towards oneself which leads to loving them without hurting them.

At this moment, the Buddha recited a verse:

"Though one may conquer a thousand times a thousand people in battle,

yet he is indeed the noblest victor who conquers himself.

Self-conquest is far better than the conquest of others.

Neither a god nor an angel can win such a victory.

By oneself alone is evil done; by oneself is one defiled.

By oneself alone is evil left undone; by oneself is one purified.

Purity and impurity depend on oneself. No one can purify another."

Pali original scripture

SN.3.8/(8) Mallikāsuttaṃ

　　 119. Sāvatthinidānaṃ Tena kho pana samayena rājā pasenadi kosalo mallikāya deviyā saddhiṃ uparipāsādavaragato hoti. Atha kho rājā pasenadi kosalo mallikaṃ deviṃ etadavoca– “atthi nu kho te, mallike, kocañño attanā piyataro”ti? “Natthi kho me, mahārāja, kocañño attanā piyataro. Tuyhaṃ pana, mahārāja, atthañño koci attanā piyataro”ti? “Mayhampi kho, mallike, natthañño koci attanā piyataro”ti.

　　 Atha kho rājā pasenadi kosalo pāsādā orohitvā yena bhagavā tenupasaṅkami; upasaṅkamitvā bhagavantaṃ abhivādetvā ekamantaṃ nisīdi. Ekamantaṃ nisinno kho rājā pasenadi kosalo bhagavantaṃ etadavoca– “idhāhaṃ, bhante, mallikāya deviyā saddhiṃ uparipāsādavaragato mallikaṃ deviṃ etadavocaṃ– ‘atthi nu kho te, mallike, kocañño attanā piyataro’ti? Evaṃ vutte, bhante, mallikā devī maṃ etadavoca– ‘natthi kho me, mahārāja, kocañño attanā piyataro. Tuyhaṃ pana, mahārāja, atthañño koci attanā piyataro’ti? Evaṃ vuttāhaṃ, bhante, mallikaṃ deviṃ etadavocaṃ– ‘mayhampi kho, mallike, natthañño koci attanā piyataro”ti.

　　 Atha kho bhagavā etamatthaṃ viditvā tāyaṃ velāyaṃ imaṃ gāthaṃ abhāsi–

　　 “Sabbā disā anuparigamma cetasā, nevajjhagā piyataramattanā kvaci.

　　 Evaṃ piyo puthu attā paresaṃ, tasmā na hiṃse paramattakāmo”ti.