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Chapter 18: Being with Good Friends, Good People and a Good Community

Once, King Prasenajit of Kosala came to the Buddha's dwelling place. After paying his respects to the Buddha, he sat down beside him and said, "World Honored One, when I meditate alone, I have this thought in my mind: You once said that we should be with good groups of people, good friends and companions instead of being with evil groups of people or companions."


The Buddha replied," Indeed it is so as you say. The Tathagata has indeed taught us to be with good people, friends and communities while avoiding evil ones."


"Your Majesty," continued the Buddha. "There was a time when I lived in a city inhabited by Shakya clan members. At that time venerable Ananda came to visit me at my dwelling place. After paying his respects he sat down beside me and said,' World Honored One! If one practices together with good people,friends,and community then half of one's practice will succeed; which means that half success comes from their help while the other half depends on our own efforts.'"


"No Ananda!" replied the Buddha." It is not like what you think it is! Practicing together with good people,friends,and community is not only key but also everything for successful practice.This means all success in practice comes from correct guidance given by them about right view,right method etc.Our own effort can only be established upon correct understanding.Therefore,I say all success in practice comes entirely from being together with good people,friends,and community who teach us right views & methods without which there cannot be any successful cultivation."


"When practitioners are together with such kind-hearted individuals they will definitely cultivate Noble Eightfold Path.They will always be influenced by these virtuous individuals towards practicing Noble Eightfold Path regularly."


"Ananda! How do these virtuous friends, good people and community cultivate Noble Eightfold Path? How do they practice it regularly?"


"Ananda! These virtuous friends, good people and community rely on their inner thoughts to not generate any afflictions or sufferings. They rely on their inner thoughts to stop all desires from arising in the mind. They rely on their inner thoughts to eliminate all afflictions and suffering. They rely on their inner thoughts to be free from any worldly attachments or bondage so that they can gradually enter into the state of Nirvana without any affliction or suffering."


"Ananda! If you want to gradually reach the state of Nirvana without any affliction or suffering as I have just mentioned then you must practice these eight paths: Right View, Right Thought, Right Speech, Right Action,Right Livelihood ,Right Effort ,Right Mindfulness & Right Concentration."


What is right view? Ananda, right view means correct understanding. What are the correct understandings? The Four Noble Truths of suffering, its cause, cessation and path as taught by the Tathagata; dependent origination; and karmic fruitfulness are all correct understandings.


What are the Four Noble Truths? The first truth is that there is suffering in this world. People experience physical and mental pain such as illness or grief from losing loved ones. There is also external suffering caused by disasters or wars that force people to flee their homes. Additionally, being with people one dislikes or those with whom one has a history of conflict can be painful. When someone we love gets hurt or dies, it causes us pain too. Everything in this world changes constantly and nothing lasts forever - not our health nor our possessions - so when things we like break down or disappear, it causes us pain.


The second truth explains that craving leads to suffering: for example, parents' love for their children may lead them to suffer if something happens to their child because they care deeply about them.


The third truth teaches how to end suffering: by eliminating craving.


The fourth truth shows the way out of suffering through following the Eightfold Path which includes Right View among other factors.


Ananda should also have faith in karma: good deeds bring good results while bad deeds bring bad consequences; past lives exist along with future ones; rebirth exists where everyone has been each other's parent at some point due to endless cycles of birth and death; some beings attain enlightenment through doing good deeds while others do so through diligent practice leading from evil towards goodness until finally breaking free from samsara's cycle of birth-and-death bondage permanently.


What is right thinking? It means correct thinking, which means before doing anything, one should consider whether their physical actions, speech and thoughts are in accordance with the Right View taught by the Buddha. In other words, if one's current physical behavior does not harm others or involve stealing or robbing others' property; if one's speech does not deceive or harm others, provoke discord among people or slander them; and if one's thoughts do not include greed, anger or ignorance of cause and effect - then they can proceed to do these things. However, if what they intend to do involves any of the aforementioned harmful behaviors, speech or thoughts towards others as described by the Buddha’s teachings on Righteousness (Dharma), then it should be avoided.


What is right speech? It refers to speaking truthfully without deceiving anyone; refraining from using rude language that slanders and harms others; avoiding meaningless talk that lacks seriousness; promoting reconciliation between people through kind words of comfort and encouragement; teaching people how to turn away from evil deeds through positive language that helps eliminate greediness, anger and ignorance within themselves.


What is right conduct? It refers to engaging in lawful activities while avoiding harming sentient beings such as killing living creatures for food purposes. One must actively protect life by helping those who are struggling with difficulties in life. They should also strive to bring happiness into other people’s lives while removing their suffering. This includes guiding individuals towards good deeds while following rules set forth by society.


What is a righteous livelihood? It means having a legitimate way of making a living without engaging in illegal activities such as killing animals for profit purposes. One must avoid thefts/robberies/burglaries along with sexual misconduct involving another person’s spouse/partner/family member(s). They must refrain from assisting someone else engage in immoral acts either directly or indirectly like cheating someone out of money etc., spreading rumors about someone else causing discord among people, or using abusive language that is meaningless and lacks seriousness. One must avoid any work that increases greediness, anger or ignorance within themselves or others.


What is right effort? It means making a consistent and persistent effort to practice the Buddha’s teachings on Righteousness (Dharma) in daily life. This includes continuing to do good deeds while increasing them; starting new good deeds as soon as possible; immediately stopping evil deeds before they are committed and never engaging in them again. By doing so, one can increase their positive karma while eliminating negative karma.


What is right mindfulness? It refers to having correct views at all times by constantly remembering the Buddha's teachings on Righteousness (Dharma). One should not engage in harmful activities such as killing living creatures for food purposes, stealing/robbing/burglary of other people's property, sexual misconduct involving another person’s spouse/partner/family member(s), lying/deceiving others with false information etc., spreading rumors about someone else causing discord among people, using abusive language that is meaningless and lacks seriousness. Instead one should cultivate thoughts of love towards all sentient beings by helping those who are struggling with difficulties in life; bringing happiness into other people’s lives while removing their suffering; guiding individuals towards good deeds while following rules set forth by society. Additionally, one should remember the Four Noble Truths taught by the Buddha: All sentient beings suffer greatly due to attachment/desire/craving which can only be eliminated through practicing righteousness (dharma); this requires eliminating attachment/desire/craving for everything worldly including oneself/others/things/etc.; this can be achieved through practicing Eightfold Path.


One should often think about the things they do to others. If one were in the other person's shoes, would they accept the same treatment? Would they feel annoyed or pained by it? If one realizes that imposing such actions on others causes annoyance and pain, then they should immediately stop doing so. However, if these actions can benefit others and bring them happiness and well-being, then one should let go of their attachment and do those things. Of course, all actions must be based on not harming others physically or emotionally and not violating the laws of their country.


What is samadhi? It means keeping a clear and peaceful mind like a still mirror at all times. No matter what happens in life, one can control their inner self from being bound or restricted by external factors. One will not worry or become attached to worldly matters because everything in this world is impermanent; nothing lasts forever. Even oneself will get sick, age, and die eventually; everything that one possesses may also be lost at any time due to various reasons. Therefore, there is no need to attach oneself to anything in this world as it is just like bubbles formed when raindrops hit water surfaces - disappearing quickly without leaving any trace behind except for good deeds (merits) or bad deeds (sins) planted during life which will follow into death.


Those who have accumulated merits will enjoy wealthiness in future lives or even ascend into heaven while those with sins may fall into poverty-stricken families or even hellish realms where suffering awaits them until debts are paid off through rebirth cycles.


Once we understand that only merits/deeds/sins can follow us after death while everything else is illusory/empty/false/unrealistic/meaningless/worthless/delusive/fleeting/temporary/transient/impermanent/vain/hollow/shallow/frivolous/trivial/mundane/worldly/materialistic/carnal, we can break free from evil and cultivate good deeds. Our mind will no longer be attached or bound by worldly matters, and thus, there will be no more thoughts of joy, anger, sorrow or happiness. We will not be restricted by greed anymore.


When one's mind is no longer attached to anything in this world and has no more thoughts about it - all suffering and pain cannot attach themselves to the mind as well. It is like an artist who cannot paint in mid-air; all his paints fall on the ground instead. Similarly, when our minds are not attached to anything in this world with no thoughts arising within us - all suffering and pain will disappear completely.


Therefore, samadhi means having a clear and peaceful mind that is not bound by external factors but only follows its own inner guidance towards enlightenment.


Ananda! When practitioners are surrounded by virtuous friends/people/groups who practice these eightfold paths through their words/actions/behaviors - they too would follow suit naturally without much effort because they have been influenced positively by them. Therefore Ananda! Being around virtuous friends/people/groups is key to success in spiritual cultivation; correct understanding (view) of teachings also plays a crucial role here.


Ananda! Those who surround themselves with virtuous friends/people/groups tend to learn from them as role models for practicing these eightfold paths regularly due to positive influence received from them.


Ananda! All sentient beings are virtuous friends of Buddha; he teaches them how to escape endless cycles of birth/death/suffering caused by aging/disease/death/pain/sorrow/grief/fear/worry/anxiety/stress/anger/hatred/greed/delusion/ignorance/etc., leading them towards eternal liberation from such sufferings.


My king, this is how the Buddha taught Ananda. To begin your practice, you must first surround yourself with good friends, good people and a virtuous community. When you are with them, control and restrain your body from doing evil deeds, refrain from speaking harsh words and prevent any unwholesome thoughts from arising in your mind. Instead, do more good deeds with your body, speak kind words and cultivate wholesome thoughts within yourself. Cut off all unwholesome actions and cultivate all wholesome practices to eliminate greed, anger and ignorance.


After practicing all these virtues without seeking rewards or gains like breathing air normally every day; then you will attain merit that is free of defilements. This means that the merits gained through performing virtuous acts without seeking anything in return will not be depleted or lost due to one's desire for rewards or attachment to the fruits of their actions. However if one has desires for rewards or attachments to the fruits of their actions just like a water tank filled with holes at its bottom leaking out water; then all merits gained through such efforts will eventually be exhausted.


When you practice virtue without seeing it as something done by oneself nor benefiting anyone else nor involving any material possessions or mental effort required - just like breathing air normally every day - then you can attain merit that is free of defilements.


By persistently practicing virtue in this way until achieving boundless merit; ultimately one can permanently escape from samsara (the cycle of birth and death).


When you cut off unwholesomeness while cultivating wholesomeness in both body action & speech as well as thought & intention without letting go easily; those around you including palace maidservants & attendants would think: "Even our king who is so noble & powerful could control his own behavior/actions/speech/thoughts so well! He does only good deeds with his body action/speaks only kind words/has only wholesome thoughts. We should follow his example and control ourselves too, not letting go easily."


When you cut off unwholesomeness while cultivating wholesomeness in both body action & speech as well as thought & intention without letting go easily; your royal relatives, family members and ministers would think: "Our king who is so noble & powerful could control his own behavior/actions/speech/thoughts so well! He does only good deeds with his body action/speaks only kind words/has only wholesome thoughts. We should follow his example and learn from him to do good deeds with our bodies, speak kindly and cultivate wholesome thoughts within ourselves. We must often do good things that benefit the people of our country just like he does. We also need to restrain ourselves from doing evil deeds."


When you cut off unwholesomeness while cultivating wholesomeness in both body action & speech as well as thought & intention without letting go easily; those in your army including generals and soldiers would think: "Our king is the commander-in-chief of the entire army. He teaches us through his actions and words how we should behave properly by following his example - not doing evil but instead doing more good deeds with our bodies, speaking kindly and having wholesome thoughts within ourselves. Our king's actions are like military orders for us which we will strictly obey without letting go easily."


When you cut off unwholesomeness while cultivating wholesomeness in both body action & speech as well as thought & intention without letting go easily; all citizens living under your rule including those living in cities or villages would think: "Our king who is so noble/powerful could control himself so well! He does only good deeds with his body/action speaks kindly/have wholesome thoughts within himself. Why should we ordinary people still commit evil? We must follow our king's example to do more good deeds with our bodies, speak kindly and cultivate wholesome thoughts within ourselves. Our king's self-control is a good thing for us."


When you cut off unwholesomeness while cultivating wholesomeness in both body action & speech as well as thought & intention without letting go easily; you will be protected from the inside out by your own actions of doing good deeds with your body, speaking kind words and having wholesome thoughts within yourself. This protection is strong and long-lasting. Your palace maidservants and attendants who follow your example will also be protected; likewise, your royal relatives, family members, ministers, generals/soldiers and citizens who follow your example will also be protected.


If everyone from top to bottom in your country does only good deeds with their bodies/action speaks only kind words/has only wholesome thoughts just like you do - not letting go easily - then the wealth/treasures of the country as well as its people's property/security would all be protected.


People in this world are constantly pursuing wealth/power/glory but those wise ones who have wisdom/virtue know that only by cutting off unwholesomeness while cultivating wholesomeness through performing


At this time, the Buddha spoke a verse:


"Continuing to carry desires,

Hoping for great wealth.

The wise practice meritorious deeds,

Praising non-indulgence.


The wise do not indulge,

And gain two kinds of benefits:

Benefits in this present life

And benefits in future lives.


Based on attaining this understanding,

Heroes call them wise."


Pali original scripture


SN.3.18/(8). Kalyāṇamittasuttaṃ


   129. Sāvatthinidānaṃ. Ekamantaṃ nisinno kho rājā pasenadi kosalo bhagavantaṃ etadavoca– “idha mayhaṃ bhante, rahogatassa paṭisallīnassa evaṃ cetaso parivitakko udapādi– ‘svākkhāto bhagavatā dhammo, so ca kho kalyāṇamittassa kalyāṇasahāyassa kalyāṇasampavaṅkassa, no pāpamittassa no pāpasahāyassa no pāpasampavaṅkassā’”ti.


   “Evametaṃ, mahārāja, evametaṃ, mahārāja! Svākkhāto mahārāja, mayā dhammo. So ca kho kalyāṇamittassa kalyāṇasahāyassa kalyāṇasampavaṅkassa, no pāpamittassa no pāpasahāyassa no pāpasampavaṅkassāti.


   “Ekamidāhaṃ, mahārāja, samayaṃ sakkesu viharāmi nagarakaṃ nāma sakyānaṃ nigamo. Atha kho, mahārāja, ānando bhikkhu yenāhaṃ tenupasaṅkami; upasaṅkamitvā maṃ abhivādetvā ekamantaṃ nisīdi. Ekamantaṃ nisinno kho, mahārāja, ānando bhikkhu maṃ etadavoca– ‘upaḍḍhamidaṃ, bhante, brahmacariyassa– yadidaṃ kalyāṇamittatā kalyāṇasahāyatā kalyāṇasampavaṅkatā’”ti.


   “Evaṃ vuttāhaṃ, mahārāja, ānandaṃ bhikkhuṃ etadavocaṃ– ‘mā hevaṃ, ānanda, mā hevaṃ, ānanda! Sakalameva hidaṃ, ānanda, brahmacariyaṃ– yadidaṃ kalyāṇamittatā kalyāṇasahāyatā kalyāṇasampavaṅkatā. Kalyāṇamittassetaṃ, ānanda, bhikkhuno pāṭikaṅkhaṃ kalyāṇasahāyassa kalyāṇasampavaṅkassa ariyaṃ aṭṭhaṅgikaṃ maggaṃ bhāvessati ariyaṃ aṭṭhaṅgikaṃ maggaṃ bahulīkarissati’”.


   “Kathañca, ānanda, bhikkhu kalyāṇamitto kalyāṇasahāyo kalyāṇasampavaṅko ariyaṃ aṭṭhaṅgikaṃ maggaṃ bhāveti, ariyaṃ aṭṭhaṅgikaṃ maggaṃ bahulīkaroti? Idhānanda, bhikkhu sammādiṭṭhiṃ bhāveti vivekanissitaṃ virāganissitaṃ nirodhanissitaṃ vossaggapariṇāmiṃ, sammāsaṅkappaṃ bhāveti …pe… sammāvācaṃ bhāveti …pe… sammākammantaṃ bhāveti …pe… sammā-ājīvaṃ bhāveti …pe… sammāvāyāmaṃ bhāveti …pe… sammāsatiṃ bhāveti …pe… sammāsamādhiṃ bhāveti vivekanissitaṃ virāganissitaṃ nirodhanissitaṃ vossaggapariṇāmiṃ. Evaṃ kho, ānanda, bhikkhu kalyāṇamitto kalyāṇasahāyo kalyāṇasampavaṅko ariyaṃ aṭṭhaṅgikaṃ maggaṃ bhāveti, ariyaṃ aṭṭhaṅgikaṃ maggaṃ bahulīkaroti. Tadamināpetaṃ, ānanda, pariyāyena veditabbaṃ yathā sakalamevidaṃ brahmacariyaṃ– yadidaṃ kalyāṇamittatā kalyāṇasahāyatā kalyāṇasampavaṅkatā”ti.


   “Mamañhi, ānanda, kalyāṇamittaṃ āgamma jātidhammā sattā jātiyā parimuccanti, jarādhammā sattā jarāya parimuccanti, byādhidhammā sattā byādhito parimuccanti, maraṇadhammā sattā maraṇena parimuccanti, sokaparidevadukkhadomanassupāyāsadhammā sattā sokaparidevadukkhadomanassupāyāsehi parimuccanti. Iminā kho etaṃ, ānanda, pariyāyena veditabbaṃ yathā sakalamevidaṃ brahmacariyaṃ– yadidaṃ kalyāṇamittatā kalyāṇasahāyatā kalyāṇasampavaṅkatā”ti.


   “Tasmātiha te, mahārāja, evaṃ sikkhitabbaṃ– ‘kalyāṇamitto bhavissāmi kalyāṇasahāyo kalyāṇasampavaṅko’ti. Evañhi te mahārāja, sikkhitabbaṃ.


   “Kalyāṇamittassa te, mahārāja, kalyāṇasahāyassa kalyāṇasampavaṅkassa ayaṃ eko dhammo upanissāya vihātabbo– appamādo kusalesu dhammesu.


   “Appamattassa te, mahārāja, viharato appamādaṃ upanissāya, itthāgārassa anuyantassa evaṃ bhavissati– ‘rājā kho appamatto viharati, appamādaṃ upanissāya. Handa, mayampi appamattā viharāma, appamādaṃ upanissāyā’”ti.


   “Appamattassa te, mahārāja, viharato appamādaṃ upanissāya, khattiyānampi anuyantānaṃ evaṃ bhavissati– ‘rājā kho appamatto viharati appamādaṃ upanissāya. Handa, mayampi appamattā viharāma, appamādaṃ upanissāyā’”ti.


   “Appamattassa te, mahārāja, viharato appamādaṃ upanissāya, balakāyassapi evaṃ bhavissati– ‘rājā kho appamatto viharati appamādaṃ upanissāya. Handa, mayampi appamattā viharāma, appamādaṃ upanissāyā’”ti.


   “Appamattassa te, mahārāja, viharato appamādaṃ upanissāya, negamajānapadassapi evaṃ bhavissati– ‘rājā kho appamatto viharati, appamādaṃ upanissāya. Handa, mayampi appamattā viharāma, appamādaṃ upanissāyā’”ti?


   “Appamattassa te, mahārāja, viharato appamādaṃ upanissāya, attāpi gutto rakkhito bhavissati– itthāgārampi guttaṃ rakkhitaṃ bhavissati, kosakoṭṭhāgārampi guttaṃ rakkhitaṃ bhavissatī”ti. Idamavoca …pe…


   “Bhoge patthayamānena, uḷāre aparāpare;


   Appamādaṃ pasaṃsanti, puññakiriyāsu paṇḍitā.


   “Appamatto ubho atthe, adhiggaṇhāti paṇḍito;


   Diṭṭhe dhamme ca yo attho, yo cattho samparāyiko.


   Atthābhisamayā dhīro, paṇḍitoti pavuccatī”ti.


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